Sugar Daddy & Sugar Baby Blog

Now that Christmas is over, I hope all you sugar daddies and sugar babies are ready for the New Years.  If you have not already put together your New Year resolutions, I hope you will work on them now.  Personally, I think it is important for everyone to have their goals all worked out before they ring in the New Years for the simple reason that if you don’t have a destination mapped out at the beginning of your journey, you will end up wandering aimlessly.  For those of us who have not achieved everything we wanted to in 2011, it is now the opportunity to plan out where you want to end up this time next year.

Speaking of goals for the new year, I am sure some of you are eager to find the perfect sugar relationship in 2012.  Obviously, the ideal sugar daddy or sugar baby arrangement differs from person to person, but I am certain no one wants to end up in a bad sugar arrangement.  Our blog post this week is about the bad and the ugly of sugar breakups, and what can be done about them.

In my “Guide to Seeking Arrangement” book, I dedicated an entire chapter to what happens “When the Sugar Sours”.  Breakups in normal relationships can usually get quite nasty because most people start their relationship without thinking of what happens if they were to break-up.  But who can blame them?  A majority of people enter into matrimony without a prenuptial agreement.  No one wants to take a leap of faith into a new relationship while at the same time think about the different “what if it fails” scenarios.  But it’s those couples who have a prenuptial agreement who end up having the most cordial divorce.  Unfortunately, it is the idealistic couples who decided true love should never be governed by a prenuptial agreement who often end up in nasty court battles over assets, or parental rights.

Sugar daddies and sugar babies who have been in successful arrangements know it is important to discuss “different breakup” scenarios up front (much like a prenuptial agreement), so when things end, everyone can leave happy.  However, there is usually a fine line between love and hatred, so the sweetest sugar union can also mean the most hurtful if things don’t work out.

Earlier this month, I was asked to be an expert witness on the Swift Justice show about a court case between a Seeking Arrangement sugar daddy member and two sugar babies.  In this case, the sugar relationship did not work out, and in revenge the two sugar babies vandalized the sugar daddy’s car.   Judge Jackie Glass, the same Las Vegas judge who sent O.J. Simpson to prison, presided over the case.  For those of you who are interested, here is the video clip of the case:

I am obviously not happy about this episode of Swift Justice for many reasons.  First, I do not think the sugar daddy or the two sugar babies are a good representation of what being a sugar daddy or sugar baby is all about.  Second, while there are many things wrong with the relationship the sugar daddy and the two sugar babies have, I completely disagree with the outcome of the case.

No matter how a Judge may feel about “sugar relationships”, he or she is required to judge the case in an unbiased manner based on the facts of the case.   And while the sugar daddy member did do many things that were “questionable” or over-reaching (such as writing a letter to the parents of the sugar babies), based entirely on the facts alone he should have won the case.  The two girls did after-all admit to vandalizing his car because they wanted revenge.

I have been asked many times by some sugar daddy and sugar baby members about how they should resolve their sugar disputes or sugar disagreements.  Based on the Swift Justice episode above, my recommendation is to think twice before you choose to bring your case in front of the whole Nation on Judge Judy or Judge Joe Brown.  It is obvious these day-time television show doesn’t work the same way a normal courtroom does, and the outcome of any case is influenced more by public opinion or show ratings than they are by the law and the true facts of the case.  So if not a public forum, what should you do when you get into a sugar dispute?

Here are my recommendations:

1. Prevention is better than cure:   The best way to deal with any dispute or disagreement is to prevent it from getting ugly.  Before taking drastic actions, take some time off to cool down your emotions, then revisit the issue with reason and rationale.
2. Take action if a crime has been committed:  Because many sugar daddies and sugar babies live in the closet, they may choose to keep quiet when they have been taken advantage of.  If a crime has been committed against you, don’t be afraid of stepping up and taking action by reporting the crime to law enforcement.  By doing so, you will not only be helping yourself, but also others who may have fallen victim if you had done nothing.
3. Take your case to the small claims court:  If your disagreement involves financial damages, consider bringing your case to a civil small claims court where you are more likely to find a judge that will rule based on facts and laws.

What are your New Year’s Resolution for 2012?

What do you think of the Swift Justice case?  Do you think Judge Julie Glass made the right decision?

Have you been in a Sugar Dispute? 

What advice would you give to fellow Sugars on how they should deal with their Sugar Disagreements?