Sugar Daddy Blog

It’s The Friend That Never Goes Away…

People choose to find a Sugar Daddy or Sugar Baby for many different reasons, but occasionally, people on the blog, or in their profiles, mention how loneliness has brought them closer to pursuing an arrangement.

As our society continues to become a safe haven for the introverted, those with a tendency towards isolation may find themselves feeling alone in a sea of strangers…

Online dating has long been the lifeboat to those otherwise not inclined to join a dating pool, but Sugar Daddy arrangements have a built-in structure for, what would ideally be, Instant Gratification.

Whether sex is involved has little to do with the effect a nice evening spent with someone your comfortable with has on filling the void.

Do any Sugar Daddies or Sugar Babies find that this style of dating helps in terms of being able to ease loneliness without any strings becoming attached?

Has anyone ever regretted something done online as a result of loneliness?

Why are some people ashamed, or nervous about being lonely?

Comments ON

Sugar Daddy Arrangement: The Set Up

Planning Your Next Arrangement Should Draw From Times Past (and not just from yours…)

Many Sugar Daddies and Sugar Babies will notice that discussing the terms of an arrangement before it begins has its pros, and cons.

There are those who suggest that keeping things left to fate, chemistry, fireworks, etc., is the best and most human way to proceed with an arrangement. There are also those who insist that the most essential difference between an arrangement and normal dating is that the ‘unknowns’ are known in advance.

“Buyer beware, but nothing ventured, nothing gained; just don’t count your chickens before they’re hatched.” - NitemareSD

No matter what side of the spectrum you may fall, we can all agree that one must always acknowledge the sacred rules of Sugar Daddy engagement:

1. Discretion must always be respected, and protected: for discreet arrangements; what goes on between SD & SB goes in the vault.

2. All parties ensure the other(s) receive their due share of mutual benefit.

3. Strings may never become attached, unless all involved agree: No guilt trips, no surprise displays of attachment, and no manipulation towards commitment (ownership) of any form.

Has anyone ever felt at odds with a potential Sugar Daddy or Sugar Baby before the 1st meeting?

Would anyone consider ‘arrangement insurance’ (agreeing to SOME benefit, even if all else fails (what would that look like?)?

What makes a Sugar Daddy seem like a fake? What makes a Sugar Baby seem like an escort?

Comments ON

SeekingArrangment.com member and unabashed author, Alicia Dunams, is offering a super-duper deal on her best-selling self-help book, Goal Digger: Lessons Learned from the Rich Men I Dated to all of YOU SD/SB bloggers! In this manifesto, Alicia encourages women to create their own wealth through entrepreneurship and investing, and by developing the millionaire mindset, which she aptly coins the ‘Rich Men Mentality.’

“Why marry a millionaire, when you can be one yourself!” was the advice she got from many of the rich men she dated, which turned her quest from wanting to marry a millionaire into a journey of self-reliance and ultimate financial freedom . Go to www.goaldigger.com to get an autographed copy of Goal Digger for $9.99, plus shipping and handling. Just use the promo code SEEKING. Act fast, offer is good while supplies last.

Sugar Daddies are known to generally seek younger women, but of course, the term ‘young’ is a relative one…

The only rule regarding age on SeekingArrangement.com is that all players must be 18+. Whether you want a classic, JFK/Marlyn Monroe arrangement, or an Exec Daddy/College Baby thing, it’s up to you. The pickle lays in getting what you want, and the answer there is all in your attitude…

Shaena:

“I am 37 years old, but many people think my kids are my younger brother and sister!  Last month I went to play pool with a friend and got asked for my ID.  Do 37 year old ladies actually ever get genuine SD’s?  I know I look young, but wouldn’t my age scare off any potential SD?  Or could this be a huge bonus?  I see many comments from SD’s saying no drama, maybe they would consider an older SB that looks younger?”

Some Sugar Daddies only arrange with women in a certain age-range, and, some Sugar Babies actually prefer younger Sugar Daddies.

But what about Sugar Mamas? There are plenty of Mamas around, and many of them seek younger men (men aren’t the only ones getting in on the sugar…).

Check out Sugar Mama ‘Dixie’…

Daniel

“Why is it hard to find an actual sugar mama? I’m willing to do anything for one but don’t have the luck to find one =["

It’s rare for one to dip into the Sugar Bowl with 100% certainty, but the typical SD/SB arrangement relies mostly on the specific offerings that each partner can provide.

Perhaps Sugar Daddy has been longing for a more… experienced partner. One who knows not just how to be cute, but how to laugh out loud without looking over her shoulder. Or, maybe he wants a very young Sugar Baby, one who he can bewilder by introducing to his trilingual friends, buying her the first car she’ll ever drive, or maybe by paying for the first place she can call her own.

I’ve read many, many’a Sugar Daddy AND Sugar Baby profile’, and one thing is for certain: you’d be dead wrong to judge any Suga by it’s cover.

Comments ON

An arrangement is what you make it…

Whether you’ve joined recently, or have been on the site for a while - by now you’ve probably noticed that in order to see the results you want, you mustn’t be timid about making your desires known.

Sugar Daddies & Sugar Babies, gay & straight, male & female, will likely see how changing their profile to reflect who they are, why they’re here, and, in their own unique way; how they want their sugar served - is crucial to getting the results they seek.

*But* - having a thoughtful and descriptive profile is only part of what can make, or break, ones sugar daddy dating experience…

Check out this Shoe Baby…”I’m gonna get what I want”

Your message campaign is typically just as if not more important than your profile text. If your inbox isn’t as satiated as you’d like, try a more aggressive messaging strategy. No one likes getting an obviously duplicated message, but in order to get your ‘message’ across to as many potentials as possible, you may consider drafting one that contains general information about yourself, the type of arrangement you seek, as well as a portion that describes the specific reasons why you think a given potential may just be the right match for you.

Everyone will develop their own system - that is, if they keep their spirits up, and stave off discouragement. Discouragement is the #1 arrangement killer; it takes out all the fun, drains self-esteem, and can possibly set you up for certain sugar daddy dating failure.

Does anyone here have qualms about describing the type of arrangements they truly desire (whether it’s through your profile, or messages)?

Who prefers to let a potential Sugar Daddy or Sugar Baby lead the way? Why might you want the ‘other’ to take charge?

Is there an arrangement you are too shy to seek? Does anyone have an arrangement fantasy they think too strange, unlikely, or impossible to request?

Comments ON

How far is Too far? What can Break the Deal?

Firstly, let’s welcome all of the New Sugar Bloggers who have shared their stories and perspectives with us recently

When choosing what kind of arrangement would work best for you, it’s often not easy to ‘melt the sugar’ so to speak, when hammaring out the details and specifics of your mutually benificial arrangement.

Many Sugar Daddies and Sugar Babies have relatively small window’s of time - within a specific area - to meet.

Zabreena:

“This site has been fantastic for me and I have met quite a few men and have SD/SB relationships with several of them. they mostly come from other parts of the country so we only meet occasionally.”

Now, many SD’s and SB’s would love the opportunity to travel, but at what point does distance, or time constraint, weigh too heavily on an already tender arrangement-framework?

Live-In Sugar Babies need not worry about bouncing back and forth across state lines to spend time with their Sugar Daddies… Check out this Live-In SB featured in a special report about SeekingArrangement.com

Does anyone here list their profile location as somewhere OTHER than their state of residence? Who prefers to seek within there local area?

What do you think about Sugar Daddis and Sugar Babies who live together? Are there reasons distance can be a pro? a con? Has anyone here felt that discussing the details of an arrangement can sometimes spoil the sugar? Should some things be left for Surprise?

Comments ON

How Would Your Circle React?

Not all Sugar Daddies are over 40, and not all Sugar Babies are under 30. Some Sugar Daddies seek both Sugar Baby Females and Sugar Baby Males. Many Sugar Mama’s seek relationships that are completely platonic, and aren’t in it for “love” as most assume. It’s become apparent that a man or woman seeking a mutually beneficial arrangement does so for a vast variety of reasons…

Just as the common understanding of who Sugar Daddies and Sugar Babies are is misunderstood, the stinging judgment often made by friends, co-workers and family alike can often be very off-mark, and sometimes ruinous.

Ben:

“Speaking of judgment - a close friend of mine has all but disowned me since I told him details of my SD lifestyle. This makes me think I should share details with no one except for all of you here.”

It would seem… (please speak up if you disagree) that Sugar Babies are more inclined to be open about their Sugar Daddy dating life than Sugar Daddies. Perhaps a Sugar Babies concern for safety trumps their concern for privacy; making a Sugar Baby more likely to tell friends and family where she or he is, and who she’s with…

Has anyone here had trouble talking about their Sugar relationship with someone outside of the scene?

Have you realized that  someone you would like to talk to about your SD or SB would just make a snap judgment without really trying to understand what a mutually beneficial arrangement is?

For those of you who choose to be discreet; what, if anything, would persuade you to share your sugar daddy dating experience(s) with the unfamiliar?

We’ve touched on the subject of Sugar Daddy Dating and Kids, but what are the ‘rules’ for introducing or explaining a Sugar Baby or Sugar Daddy companion to a child? To a friend or co-worker?

Comments ON

Sugar Daddy Dating: Take it Step, by Step

“Resolve to be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant with the weak and the wrong. Sometime in your life you will have been all of these.” -Anonymous Sugar Daddy/Sugar Baby Blogger

There have been some beautiful,  painful, and honest examples of how the hard times don’t just hit one of us when they come, but in some way or another, all of us. May I thank all of those who have shown such love and honesty on this blog!

BlondieNYC:

First and foremost, you need to honor yourself, to love yourself, to hold yourself in high esteem before you get involved with anyone. If you find yourself involved with someone who continuously belittles you, you gotta ask yourself a few questions: why would anyone knock someone down psychologically? Why would someone who professes to care about someone belittle them constantly?

When you first embarked on your sugar dating life; creating your profile, choosing which pics to display, etc., you may have had a different idea of how your experience would be than how it has actually evolved. Many think that Sugar Daddies and Sugar Babies can be put into one or two general categories; especially if they’re not familiar with the concept of ‘no-strings-attached’, or ‘mutually beneficial’ dating. Yet, it’s likely that after a while, you’re original notions of what it would be like to arrange a relationship with someone  on this site has changed.

So, the resolve may be to take it “Step by Step”. It may mean changing your profile text to reflect how your own expectations have changed. You might receive messages from SD’s or SB’s that make you think twice about what your profile says, or, maybe encourage you to add something you hadn’t thought of before…

Has anyone here changed something in their life, because of a SD or SB - whether it was from a message, a profile, or actual encounter?

Who thinks that there may be a SD or SB out there who can bring you positive change?

What, if anything, would come in the way of you making the leap to arrange a mutually beneficial relationship?… Distance? Family? a Partner? Work? Kids? Lack of confidence?

Comments ON

Throughout this blog, there have been Sugar Babies, and Sugar Daddies, who have expressed their opinions about members who have used the site for extended periods of time.

Now it’s time to clear the air, and talk about why some SD’s & SB’s choose to stay for a few weeks, or a lifetime.

Lisa:

I don’t know about everyone else , but I am on this site to meet someone and if I see my response slow down, I will update my profile, not just leave it the same all the time.

Sugar Daddy Dating isn’t like normal dating, which is generally geared towards finding a monogamous partner in lasting love. This may explain why many Sugar Daddies, and Sugar Babies, choose to keep their profiles active for a few months, then non-active for a few months, and then active again - perhaps on and off like that, for a lifetime.

SeekingArrangement.com was founded to provide a home for those who practice the Mutually Beneficial Arrangement lifestyle. There’s not a true end-goal built-in to the sugar daddy lifestyle, in fact, for many here, making arrangements as opposed to dating for marriage is one of the most appealing aspects of mutually beneficial dating.

Does anyone think that there is a different measuring stick for Sugar Daddies and Sugar Babies in terms of how long they should be on the site?

Who thinks that SeekingArrangement.com is one of the best examples of a dating site where it’s actually more appropriate to maintain a profile indefinitely?

Why and When should a Sugar Daddy or Sugar Baby update or change his or her profile?

Comments ON (Vote on the Polls!!! —> see sidebar)

Hi there!

The Daily Beast, the new online magazine published by Tina Brown (Vanity Fair, The New Yorker) is seeking a woman who has (or had) a sugar daddy to write a short essay (or tell your story) about her relationship experience.

There are several angles we’d be willing to consider, but we’d like to link the topic to the faltering economy somehow. Did you have a sugar daddy who lost his job and couldn’t support you anymore? Did you start dating a sugar daddy because you yourself lost your job or were deeply in debt?

We’re very open to ideas, so please do email me at thedailybeast (at) seekingarrangement.com. This topic will be handled with complete and total sensitivity. Thank you very much!

Sincerely, Will Doig, Features Editor

Sugar Movie Picks…

AMERICAN GIGILO (1980)

DIRTY ROTTEN SCOUNDRELS (1988)

GENTLEMEN PREFER BLONDES (1953)

HENRY AND JUNE (1990)

HOW TO MARRY A MILLIONAIRE (1953)

MISTRESS (1992)

MY ONE AND ONLY (due out 2009)

THE OTHER BOLEYN GIRL (2008)

PRETTY WOMAN (1990)

PRICELESS (2006) French - Thanks Chloe

SHOP GIRL (2005)

SOME LIKE IT HOT (1959)

DAISIES (1967) - Thanks SouthernExec

SECRETARY (2002) - Thanks RachelJay

KLUTE (1971) - Thanks JaneyW

Are there any movie lovers in tha house? What other sugar worthy cinema should be added to the list?

Hollywood has done a semi-decent job, as of late especially, depicting the neo-sugar daddy relationship… Check out this trailer for Steve Martin’s “Shop Girl” (2005).

Low-Key Arrangements…

Not all arrangements involve neon lights, fast cars, extravagant meals, luxury suites or  Hollywood flare. In fact, some of the most enjoyable arrangements are spent decidedly low-key, perhaps with a nice bowl of Kettle Corn and a good flick on that new Blue-Ray DVD player Sugar Daddy just bought you

Has anyone here simply wanted to relax with their sugar, whether it’s playing a two-player on the system, sipping some lemonade on the back porch, or enjoying a nice laid-back game of miniature golf?

What you do for fun with you sugar is one thing, and then there’s what you do for kicks… should I even ask if there’s such a thing as ‘low-key’ kink? Speak up!

cre8tor:

“low-key? Oh yes….a nice winter evening by the fire, glass of wine, good music. Watching a movie, cuddling and then going from there. Even cooking together, dancing in the living room. then there is the time I served dinner topless. And this weekend? a hike looking out over the vineyards, away from everyone, a blanket on the ground, bottle of wine…..use your imagination.”

Comments ON

The Common Bond… Friendship

As many of you have mentioned recently, it’s hard to have any human relationship without emotions being involved. Whether you plan a quaint stint, or an ongoing arrangement, there will be a unique vibe to every mutually beneficial relationship you make.

You might notice the vibe of your arrangement from the 1st message. Did he or she give you a thoughtful break-down of exactly how both parties would benefit? Or did they write you something more casual and indirect? Now, the question of what style of message you prefer isn’t nessecarily what I’m getting at here, but feel free to chime in on the style that you most prefer, and why.

A Sugar Daddy arrangement can be a unique, life-long experience shared between two people who understand, and value the meaning of reciprocity.

“…it’s funny, I have more male Sugar Daddies that are friends.” -Gail

“…I have two great friendships that came out of NSA relationships.” -SouthernExec

Does anyone feel they’ve formed a friendship with they’re SD or SB? If your SD or SB friend is down on their luck, how, as a friend, not a SB or SD, would you help them?

Would it be easy for you to step up as a real friend for your SD or SB, even if it means that you might have to become more than what your original role entailed?

As most of you already know, ‘NSA’ stands for “no-strings-attached”, and that is the, eh hem, “centerpiece”, of what most of us seek in a mutually beneficial, Sugar Daddy relationship.

There are many reasons we like NSA. It keeps the threat of human ownership out of the picture. It helps stave off hurt feelings, because love is strictly out of the equation. It allows for more spontaneity, more sensuality, and keeps the sex hotter, for longer.

Sugar Babies, & Daddies must often toe the line of not becoming too emotionally involved/attached, while also not being too far removed/distant.

Has anyone here ever had a no-strings-attached SD/SB relationship evolve into something different?

Can a Sugar Daddy and Sugar Baby show they care for one another, without seeming like they want a serious relationship? Has anyone here felt the need to cut strings for fear of things getting too close?

How can Sugar Daddies and Sugar Babies maintain a string-less relationship without seeming careless of each others feelings, and lives?

Do the Holidays Bring Sugar, or Coal?

Giving gifts, eating pie, sharing wholesome moments with family and friends… something we all can identify with; the Holiday spirit… right? H’mmm, something tells me not all of us are as eager for the upcoming holiday season as our friends at Hallmark would like us to be.

One Sugar Baby Writes:

“The holidays are always a difficult time for me. My family is out of town, all my friends are romantically connected and my Sugar Daddy (SD) is married. Most are involved with family and friends and have little time to see the SB. For me, this, is one of the reasons a SD helps out financially. Not only to help with the material needs but also to help during those emotional and personal times when he cannot be there. It’s not a substitute, but it helps a bit.”

How should Sugar Daddies and Sugar Babies handle holiday gatherings, gift giving, and over-all celebration? What special things can a Sugar Daddy or Sugar Baby do to make their Sugar feel special during this holiday season?

Comments ON