The word arrangement has gotten a lot of mileage lately, with everyone from Chelsea Lately to Dick Cheney finding it most suitable to describe certain types of non-traditional relationships.
It’s not always easy to know exactly how to describe any relationship, and many sugar daddies and sugar babies have wondered when their connection with a potential SD or SB becomes an actual ‘arrangement’: “I started looking for a sugar daddy on the site 9 months ago, and decided to only look for single sugar daddies and that I would be their only current sugar baby. Even though I prefer to have exclusive arrangements, I still believe in the no-strings-attached and mutually beneficial aspects – which I thought were the two defining characteristics of an ‘arrangement’.” – Anonymous
-55% of sugars polled on the blog say they prefer to have one sugar at a time
The level of intimacy and commitment in any arrangement depends on many factors, but the sugar should always be mutually beneficial and, most importantly, fun.
In this bustling world of online sugar daddy dating, thousands of seekers are materializing their goals and fantasies with the use of sugar. With all the opportunities in the Sugarbowl, it’s not hard to get lost in the possibilities.
Common Concerns of Newbie Sugars
“What type of pictures should I post? If any?”
“How much time and effort should I expect to exert before I secure a sugar arrangement?”
Choices, choices, choices.
Perhaps there’s a healthy kind of mystery inherent in Sugarland… one that implores us to treat all potentials with respect and honesty…
Has the sugar presented you with any tough choices? Care to share?
If you give could 1 tip to a sugar who is seeking an arrangement with you, what would it be?
The meaning of and difference between the words ‘relationship’ and ‘arrangement’ is an ongoing conversation in the sugar daddy dating world. Finding out what a potential sugar daddy or sugar baby desires on an emotional and physical level is important, yet not always easy…
“Any suggestions on how to better clarify that I am NOT wanting a real relationship? I thought my profile was pretty substantive and detailed enough about wanting to have fun, long distance, no drama.” -UncommonSB
How do you let potential sugars know the level of emotional and physical involvement you seek? In your profile?
Have any sugar-profile headings stuck out to you? Care to share?
There are all kinds of sugar daddy arrangements out there, but one aspect of a mutually beneficial arrangement that no sugar should neglect is appreciation – not just for the material sugar, but for the arrangement as a whole.
While even most newbie sugars know that being grateful goes a long way in making an arrangement sweet, many have reported a less than desired level of sugar gratitude…
“Unfortunately, generosity does not always beget appreciation, but rather greed. The phrase “no good deed goes unpunished” comes to mind . . .”- NYGent
The most important thing I’ve learned regarding sugar relationships that this is not about paying for sex but about giving and appreciation. Sex is a part of the relationship, but sex by itself is cheap and does not worth much. Conversations are part of relationship too, but who cares about conversations with people we don’t appreciate!- Margo
How important is feeling appreciated to you in a mutually beneficial arrangement?
Do you test potential sugars for appreciation/gratitude? If so, how?
Do sugars who show less appreciation get more benefits than those who show more?
Is having a ‘never satisfied’ attitude a way to get more sugar for less? Is this strategy OK in your book?
Many here know what it’s like to have exciting developments in your sugarlife that are best left unspoken around the office or at the dinner table. While us sugar-bloggers know that confiding in the sugar family is (largely) a safe and comfortable outlet, SeekingArrangement still receives tons of emails – some nice, some not so nice – from those who want to express their feelings about the Sugarbowl.
This Northeastern sugar baby is finding some sweet surprises on the site…
“I’m sending you a message because I need to tell someone how much I love this site that will appreciate it (my gf are getting a little jealous and curious but wont admit it haha)…So I have been emailing back and forth a little one of the “seekers” on here, and today he asked me for my number so we could text a little. So…who do I get a call from…the Louis Vuitton store in Copley square to ask me if I would like to pick up my gift or have them ship it! I’m sporting a new Trivoli GM…holla!!! Seeker sent me a text this evening “Danielle, I do hope you enjoy you’re gift now can I please take you dinner”
P.S. He’s one of the certified members…
p.p.s I promise I won’t send anymore of these annoying emails”
Have you been pleasently surprised by a sugar? Care to share?
Gemini29: What is an acceptable level of flirty/sexy talk from a potential sugar (pre-arrangement)?
Do you have any sugar in your weekend plans? Seeking an arrangement?
To commemorate the sugarhood of seekers all across the world, let’s give ourselves a nice, warm (re)welcome.
“Hey all, I signed up yesterday and just wanted to say hi to everyone in the community! Kinda bummed I missed out on all this Chicago buzz; hope everyone has a blast! I’ve never been in a SD/SB arrangement, so forgive me as I observe and try to get my bearings! Hope to hear from some of you, I’ve just finished up my profile! -BostonSB nikki
Do you play-up or play-down certain aspects of your personality to enhance the sugar? If so, how?
What can help a sugar daddy arrangement stay fresh and exciting? Any tips?
Care to give your 2010 sugar introduction? What kind of sugar are you, now?
a
A long-time member recently said that for him, it’s often difficult to gauge whether someone he meets outside the sugarbowl is interested in him romantically as an older and established man, or if the friendship they seek is purely platonic. He says SA is like a cafe where he can meet “great people” who, by being on the site, signal their potential interest in an arrangement that could be intimate.
Most here are seeking an arrangement that will involve some type of intimacy, yet many sugars have had platonic arrangements they find plenty sweet. One Hawaiian sugar baby wrote that she received an allowance from a sugar daddy who lives in Texas and never wanted to meet in person. Yet 77% of sugars polled say they’re not interested in “platonic/non-sexual arrangements”.
“[...] i have been burned by the “platonic” too but somehow I just can’t bring myself to say directly to someone, in person, “now you do understand that this will involve intimacy, don’t you?” If they are on the site they should understand that, or make explicit in their profile (as I have seen some do), that they are expressly NOT looking for a physical relationship.”- NYGent
Chemistry and negotiation are words found often in Sugarland, both elements balancing out in a unique way in every arrangement.
How does negotiation and chemistry factor in to how intimate you are with a sugar?
SincereSD: How do the rest of you handle seeing people you know when on a sugar date?
a
Sugar daddies and sugar babies may not be seeking love, but they certainly know it’s ups and downs…
“I joined SA after i got “abandoned” by my ex. He took the car, and left the state.” – goodgirl
The idea of replenishing sugar has gotten many through the worst of heartbreak. Ironically, it’s the sugar that brings the sensitive-at-heart and the indifferent together again.
Are you open to “pay per meet” arrangements? Why or why not?
What 3 things can you not go without in an arrangement?